Friday, December 19, 2008

i don't knowwww

Sigh...It's been awhile. Been quite busy, finals, papers and shit.
Been kinda agitated about the whole 'about to graduate. must find good internship.' thing. i'm a junior but people are already freakin' out about internships cause when senior year starts, people will already start getting job offers by october. fuckers.
this is the 1st time in my life that i feel like i can't see my future. in high school, you know you're heading to college. i know that i'm heading towards a job, but i just can't see what kinda job i'm gonna do. i can't do much with my anthro major in hk and that's where i wanna live, at least for now. so i'm taking finance right now. not interested in it at all.
and i just got an interview for a world music director position at the radio station, not sure how well it went. i applied for music director (who looks over indie rock/pop stuff) and didn't get it. was a sucker punch to the stomach. so i'm not going to hold high hopes for this one. but the truth is, i really want/need a leadership position.
planning your life out and staying on track is overrated. but i can't helpt it because i'm the one whose most 'on track' out of my siblings. there's lots of pressure for me to do well. fuck.
i don't know where i'm going.

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